We all have different characters.Some of us remains calm and analyze the situation in a quarrel, some of us would like to win the quarrel by verbally abuse the other party without realizing it, some of us would suck in up and keep to her/himself. Which one is representing you?
I'm never good at fighting or making conversations.
I'm the one who always wish "I should have said that just now ..." after quarrels / incidents. When i'm in an quarrel, i couldn't think straight or analyze the situation; there would be a lot of "Go to hell, please.", "How many million people died everyday and why aren't you one?" kind of thoughts swamp into my minds. But i never said it out because it is pointless and it couldn't win me the quarrel. I ended up shut up and suck all of it up and it became one of the many suspended feelings i have had. Suspended feelings will come out uglier at a later stage and made you sensitive towards trivial.
I have hurt him with my words.
And that's the first time he cut off my call without saying goodbye when we are in the midst of arguement over the phone. I knew he will be hurt but in order to win the quarrel, i said it out. I was in a cab. Like usual, he pretends fights was never happened afterwards and i couldn't be sure if he will ever forget it. Everyone is fragile. They may forget what you said but they will always remember how you made them feel. It must be a bad feeling.
Don't ever try to retort them with that kinds of words they use.
No one likes to lose. Everyone likes to win and especially in proving their points across. They may resort to humiliate or defy your behaviors, we have to win the quarrel in a higher level of intelligence. Winning the quarrel doesn't mean speak louder or successfully humiliate the other party in return. Find out the problem and solve it. If the other party still continue, it's time for you to leave (the scene).
Grow up. Don't let anger get the better of you.
I'm bad at controlling my temper when there is a quarrel and always say something irrelevant in order to win the quarrel. I'm learning to be more rational in an argument, learning to be not let anger get the better of me, and learning to bear the consequences of my words. We never know whether we have hurt them with our words unintentionally.
Ask yourself / myself.
If the other party have died because of what you said, how would you feel?
If someone said this to me, how would i feel?